Summer
It's easy for me to think of everything that I want to write down when using my mental dialogue. I actually do it quite often, like a little journal on repeat of what I'm going to say for you to read. The trouble with that is forgetting what I'm thinking about and finally sitting down to write it all out. Having that mental journal turns into a blank page.
It's called task paralysis, and I struggle hard with it. The idea of doing the task gives me dopamine, but getting started to execute the task is what causes me to freeze up. I'm still learning how to work with my ADHD.
I used to think that the answer would be to tear myself down, call myself lazy, and force myself to just do the task. That's not really the healthiest way to go about it. I want to enjoy writing my blogs and not dread them. It's not homework or a chore; it's me expressing my creative side and feeling lucky that I have people who take the time to want to read what I have to say, think, feel, etc. Even if no one is reading this right now, I at least got it out of my head.
So, let's begin with the fact that it's been three and ½ months since my last post. If you took the time to read that one, you know that it was a letter dump full of emotion. Everything has been a slap in the face, and the second I get a chance to take a breath, I hardly have time to process what just happened because another thing is right behind me, ready to hit me in the back of the head.
I don't want to jinx anything by saying that things have calmed down, but I at least have reached a point where I can allow myself to feel depressed without actually wanting to disappear due to overstimulation. My psychologist calls it "the escape hatch," and apparently it's also really common for people with ADHD and Depression to go into an all-or-nothing idea when they get overstimulated. Mine happens to be wanting to be a fly on the wall. People can want to disappear without dying. A lot of the time, the idea of being unreachable just sounds relaxing. For me, this is a sign that I've been putting everything and everyone else first, so I'm forgetting to make time for myself.
I have also realized that the more I talk about my nieces and nephews without giving a name, it can be confusing to keep up with. The best way to keep them private while having you as the reader follow along would be to change their names, and that will cause me to confuse myself. I'll use initials and say things like "oldest Sister" or similar. I made this chart in Google Documents, and it's the part of this blog post that has taken the longest to figure out, so I apologize if you need to zoom in to read it.
June
The end of our lease was this month. We had pre-toured homes and apartments, but there was one in particular that we wanted to come back to. For the last 10+ years, we have lived in a privately owned one-bedroom apartment. It was affordable and cozy for the area we lived in. We didn't want to live in apartments that were corporate-owned; they nickel and dime you for every penny they can get. Luckily, we found a privately owned complex not too far from where we already lived. Our current place only offered studio and one-bedroom apartments. We wanted to upgrade to a two-bedroom to feel less cramped. Our gaming computers and giant love sack are the culprits of hogging our space.
When we toured our new place, they told us that they were offering a two-week rent-free Summer special for new tenants. Luck was on our side, and we ended up getting the entire month for free because we applied two weeks into the month, and they said our credit was good enough to cover the cost. That helped us out a lot because we still had to pay our final month's rent where we were at.
It was not a smooth process, to say the least. We spent our days off work packing and moving. Every day after work, we did one trip of moving and traded off every other night for an evening session to pack. I work 10-hour shifts starting at 4 a.m., so I went to sleep about 7 or 8 pm. On top of taking Juno out for his bathroom break walks. I hardly had time to give myself some rest in between. This caused me to lose motivation to move or pack. I had some task paralysis because I didn't want to do anything from being phsycially/mentally/
Aside from the stressors of moving, it was also Nephew A's birthday month. My mom paid for his birthday party at the community pool. He only got to see his friends at his 6th-grade graduation, so now that he had moved back home, he was really excited to reunite with them.
As heartwarming as that sounded, Sheldon and I ended up picking him and his parents up for his party because "their car wouldn't start." My sister's car has allegedly had issues off and on, while her husband's car has a breathalyzer in it from his DUI last year. Instead of arguing with A's parents, we just bit our tongues and took them to the pool because it's his birthday. If they can't stay sober for one day and refuse to admit they need help, then there's nothing we can say or do to get it through their heads.
His dad reeked of alcohol, and he sounded just as out of it as my sister with her brain atrophy. At one point he stood up and passed out on the lawn at the pool. I grabbed a lifeguard, and he immediately sat up and said he was pre-diabetic. I was very apologetic to the poor teenagers. Dealing with a drunk adult man is the last thing they should be having to handle at their summer job.
My mom was also flustered because she wanted to save $2 per child with my sister's ID (being a local resident), and not all of the kids showed up at the same time. I told his older sister to invite a couple of her friends so she isn't stuck with junior high kids, and she was really grateful for that. I paid for them so my mom wouldn't have more minor inconveniences on her plate.
Sister M at one point also started calling the shots on when certain events were happening, and I stepped in to say, "I think Mom wanted to do this next." She said Too bad this is my son's birthday." Our mom was nice enough to put the party together and pay for it; the least she could do was have some respect for that.
His older sister A's biological father offered to drive his family home after the party. He didn't want us to have to share the stress the entire time, which was very appreciated. He agreed that he could also smell the alcohol and lectured them after the party about it. It only led to defensive feelings, but at least they knew they weren't being as secretive as they thought.
As far as finishing moving out goes, I am really grateful to the friends and family who came and helped me pack some days, move some days, and even clean. I paid my sister M's daughter A to help clean, and little did I know that my sister failed to teach her how. She was reading the toilet bowl cleaner instructions and went to scrub the toilet with her hands until I offered to help her and showed her there was a toilet brush. I realized I had to explain what to do when I asked her to help do something. Luckily, her dad said he will make sure she's ready for when she graduates and moves out on her own.
One more minor inconvenience for this month was that I had a post-surgery follow-up with my gynecologist. Despite her sending in the referral to the OBGYN for my surgery, they never sent her the test results. So I had a pointless appointment that resulted in me filling out a form requesting my records to be released.
I did have my yearly physical check up - That went well, at least.
As heartwarming as that sounded, Sheldon and I ended up picking him and his parents up for his party because "their car wouldn't start." My sister's car has allegedly had issues off and on, while her husband's car has a breathalyzer in it from his DUI last year. Instead of arguing with A's parents, we just bit our tongues and took them to the pool because it's his birthday. If they can't stay sober for one day and refuse to admit they need help, then there's nothing we can say or do to get it through their heads.
His dad reeked of alcohol, and he sounded just as out of it as my sister with her brain atrophy. At one point he stood up and passed out on the lawn at the pool. I grabbed a lifeguard, and he immediately sat up and said he was pre-diabetic. I was very apologetic to the poor teenagers. Dealing with a drunk adult man is the last thing they should be having to handle at their summer job.
My mom was also flustered because she wanted to save $2 per child with my sister's ID (being a local resident), and not all of the kids showed up at the same time. I told his older sister to invite a couple of her friends so she isn't stuck with junior high kids, and she was really grateful for that. I paid for them so my mom wouldn't have more minor inconveniences on her plate.
Sister M at one point also started calling the shots on when certain events were happening, and I stepped in to say, "I think Mom wanted to do this next." She said Too bad this is my son's birthday." Our mom was nice enough to put the party together and pay for it; the least she could do was have some respect for that.
His older sister A's biological father offered to drive his family home after the party. He didn't want us to have to share the stress the entire time, which was very appreciated. He agreed that he could also smell the alcohol and lectured them after the party about it. It only led to defensive feelings, but at least they knew they weren't being as secretive as they thought.
As far as finishing moving out goes, I am really grateful to the friends and family who came and helped me pack some days, move some days, and even clean. I paid my sister M's daughter A to help clean, and little did I know that my sister failed to teach her how. She was reading the toilet bowl cleaner instructions and went to scrub the toilet with her hands until I offered to help her and showed her there was a toilet brush. I realized I had to explain what to do when I asked her to help do something. Luckily, her dad said he will make sure she's ready for when she graduates and moves out on her own.
One more minor inconvenience for this month was that I had a post-surgery follow-up with my gynecologist. Despite her sending in the referral to the OBGYN for my surgery, they never sent her the test results. So I had a pointless appointment that resulted in me filling out a form requesting my records to be released.
I did have my yearly physical check up - That went well, at least.
July
Things settled down after the move-in, so the goal was to get unpacked. Which came with the struggle of wanting to rest but also not feeling like I could rest while things were unfinished. I never want to be one of those people who take months to unpack after moving in somewhere. I want to enjoy utilizing the space that we were so eager to have. We also had to budget a little tighter because a bigger space meant more furniture to fill in the gaps. I'm still paying off my medical bills on the side of everything.
Our old unit was 750 sq feet, whereas this one is 1,000 sq ft. It was shaped a little differently; ironically, our old fridge was larger, and we had a pantry. So getting something for more storage space was necessary. I really wanted to finally have a home that I wasn't embarrassed to have guests over in. Instead of saying, "Sorry it's cramped." I can just say, "Welcome to our cozy cottage."
Our old unit was 750 sq feet, whereas this one is 1,000 sq ft. It was shaped a little differently; ironically, our old fridge was larger, and we had a pantry. So getting something for more storage space was necessary. I really wanted to finally have a home that I wasn't embarrassed to have guests over in. Instead of saying, "Sorry it's cramped." I can just say, "Welcome to our cozy cottage."
We also ended up having some busy weekends aside from unpacking. Nephew J came to sleep over one weekend, and another weekend it was my niece H. Their cousins from sister M, A & A have had several sleepovers when we've babysat in the past, so these two were very adamant that they wanted a turn. As you've seen from previous posts, it's hard to give the kids attention that is not one-on-one. Which is why they were spread-out sleepovers.
My nephew J was still awake when I got up to take my medication the following morning. Sheldon was passed out on the floor, so I assume they had a fun night of playing Palworld. He took Juno outside to the bathroom with me, and I made him take the medication that knocked him out. Ironically, I got asked to help at work for a minute and came home to both of the boys still asleep. We took him to the dollar store, and I let him pick anything up to $20. He was really excited to get a Nerf machine gun for $10.
My niece H was a bit more of an adventure when she slept over. My mom has full custody of her, so she wanted me to tell people that I was her big sister. I see a lot of my younger self in her. Not just the ADHD, but sadly some of the insecurity of trauma triggers. I hope that I helped and can continue to help her through it. I have to remember that I'm not responisble to fix everythign just because I care, though. My cousin came over, and we took her to the dollar store. I let her pick out things with the same $20 limit, and she was obsessed with the skin care section.
I surprised her and paid for us to get mani-pedis. I've never had one before, and it wasn't a bad experience. She really wanted to get fake nails, but I told her they were too expensive. I did, however, let her get gel polish instead of normal polish, so that made up for it. She asked me if something happened to Grandma and Grandpa and if we would adopt her. I told her to ask Sheldon, so she went to him and asked. He looked at her and said, "Sure," which meant a lot. She kept running into the game room at random to give him a hug and say she loves him. That was something that I used to do a lot when I first moved in with Sheldon; we would be in separate rooms doing our own things, but I'd go in the other room to give some love and go back.
Both J and H don't know how to swim. J wasn't afraid to use a pool floatie and other supports to help him. H was too afraid of what other kids might think of her if she wore floaties. Some kids in our complex area were really nice to her
Both J and H don't know how to swim. J wasn't afraid to use a pool floatie and other supports to help him. H was too afraid of what other kids might think of her if she wore floaties. Some kids in our complex area were really nice to her
We both don't want kids, but he understands my care for my nieces and nephews. It's not their fault they were born into a really shitty and traumatizing family. I told her I can't afford all the special spoils if she were my full-time kid, and she said, "It's not because you buy me things; it's because you're you," and god damn it, that hit me in the feels.
She fell asleep by me; she is scared to sleep alone. I guess she was left alone at a stranger's house for two days before she went to school and was sent to live with my mom. She was so happy to have fallen asleep holding Juno's paw too. Throughout the night, she sat up; she talked; she flipped someone off and tossed and turned. I'm surprised I got any sleep. I had restless sleep when I was her age. I used to sleepwalk, sleep-talk, and keep my eyes wide open.
She's also a year behind in reading because she came to my mom when she was in first grade. When she was left alone at a stranger's house for two days, she went back to school in nothing but a T-shirt and underwear. No socks, no shoes, no pants. Her backpack was full of weed. Not only did she miss a lot of school, but she had to go to behavioral therapy on top of that because she used to have meltdowns to the point where she would try to slam her head onto the cement. She's come a long way since living with my mom, but there's some educational catching up to do.
I also felt pretty grateful to help take my sister M's daughter A to her driver's ed lessons while I could. She was very nervous about the coach, as well as it being with high school kids that are not from her own high school. She did great, though, and can get her license in December! I low-key want to give her my car and use it as an excuse to get my dream convertible Mustang. But I also don't want to take out another car loan when I have this one paid off for now. A fancy car and premium gas prices are another reason I'm holding off on that for now.
Oh, another fun fact of July was that sister M got caught shoplifting. At the start of the month, she was still on hospice care. Allegedly, at 4 a.m., she went for a walk, tried stealing out of worry about food, and was caught. She told us several different stories, and we thought that maybe her hallucinations were starting up again. Lo and behold, they were not. She had a very real scheduled court date for it.
July was supposed to be the month when she could see a liver specialist about a transplant. There's still the possibility of being denied due to her brain atrophy, but either way, she was in line to find out. In order to be seen, she had to get taken off hospice, which her husband lined up. He then claimed that their insurance doesn't cover the liver specialist that they recommended, and it got pushed out. Though M has been telling us that she's been allowed to take a shot here and there and it won't hurt her liver. Part of being qualified for a transplant is proof of living in a sober home. She is also still insisting that her liver is healing itself and she's okay, which she isn't.
If you're sick of hearing about it, think about how I feel at this point. Grieving for someone who is still alive and being told that she wouldn't make it this far was really tough. I should be happy that she made it this far, but instead I see the aftermath of it all. She's living in a mental cycle of her own trauma, and it's on full repeat due to her dementia. On one hand, I'm grateful to have had some more time with her and to not find out that she was dead without explanation. On the other hand, it's seeing her inner suffering and selfish reactions that has reminded me that you can't save people who don't want to be saved.
Even if it's not affecting my everyday life right now, she's still my sister and everything about this entire situation has just flat-out sucked.
I also had the opportunity to get an MRI this month. The results showed that I have some mild scholiosis as well as my DDD is pretty rapid for someone my age. Due to my pelvic floor still healing with its own scar tissue, I took the initiative to get back into aquatic therapy. It's been helpful but rough because being on the hypermobility spectrum means that I need to strengthen my muscles but not over-strengthen them. The more I learn about it, the more it explains why I easily pull my muscles and hurt myself all of the time.
This reminds me that there's a whole other ballpark of things going on with my in-laws that at least don't affect me as heavily as my immediate family. Sheldon's oldest brother went through a divorce two years ago but has found someone new in the dating pool. I'm very happy for him. His sister went through with her divorce. I don't remember if I mentioned it before or not, but I had to teach her and his parents what a narcissist was, as well as gaslighting. That wasn't very pretty, but it's better than staying in an abusive relationship. Then there's his other brother, who has also been having TBD marriage issues. It's their daughter who came out as trans this past year, and Sheldon and I have been doing what we can to help her feel validated, loved, and accepted in any way that we can.
Sheldon's mom had surgery on her spine for a sciatic nerve. She's healing really well, at least. The issue was that her prior surgery missed the entire problem of her back pain, and when she was still not feeling better, new doctors evaluated her and were like, "uhm, yeah, that wasn't the problem; this was." Apparently it was in an area that the surgeon should have noticed during her surgery but didn't. It took a while to get her in to see someone, but at least it got taken care of in the end. She's similar to me in that her migraines start as tension headaches in the neck and shoulders. Maybe I can help her out as I learn things with my physical therapy.
She's also a year behind in reading because she came to my mom when she was in first grade. When she was left alone at a stranger's house for two days, she went back to school in nothing but a T-shirt and underwear. No socks, no shoes, no pants. Her backpack was full of weed. Not only did she miss a lot of school, but she had to go to behavioral therapy on top of that because she used to have meltdowns to the point where she would try to slam her head onto the cement. She's come a long way since living with my mom, but there's some educational catching up to do.
I also felt pretty grateful to help take my sister M's daughter A to her driver's ed lessons while I could. She was very nervous about the coach, as well as it being with high school kids that are not from her own high school. She did great, though, and can get her license in December! I low-key want to give her my car and use it as an excuse to get my dream convertible Mustang. But I also don't want to take out another car loan when I have this one paid off for now. A fancy car and premium gas prices are another reason I'm holding off on that for now.
Oh, another fun fact of July was that sister M got caught shoplifting. At the start of the month, she was still on hospice care. Allegedly, at 4 a.m., she went for a walk, tried stealing out of worry about food, and was caught. She told us several different stories, and we thought that maybe her hallucinations were starting up again. Lo and behold, they were not. She had a very real scheduled court date for it.
July was supposed to be the month when she could see a liver specialist about a transplant. There's still the possibility of being denied due to her brain atrophy, but either way, she was in line to find out. In order to be seen, she had to get taken off hospice, which her husband lined up. He then claimed that their insurance doesn't cover the liver specialist that they recommended, and it got pushed out. Though M has been telling us that she's been allowed to take a shot here and there and it won't hurt her liver. Part of being qualified for a transplant is proof of living in a sober home. She is also still insisting that her liver is healing itself and she's okay, which she isn't.
If you're sick of hearing about it, think about how I feel at this point. Grieving for someone who is still alive and being told that she wouldn't make it this far was really tough. I should be happy that she made it this far, but instead I see the aftermath of it all. She's living in a mental cycle of her own trauma, and it's on full repeat due to her dementia. On one hand, I'm grateful to have had some more time with her and to not find out that she was dead without explanation. On the other hand, it's seeing her inner suffering and selfish reactions that has reminded me that you can't save people who don't want to be saved.
Even if it's not affecting my everyday life right now, she's still my sister and everything about this entire situation has just flat-out sucked.
I also had the opportunity to get an MRI this month. The results showed that I have some mild scholiosis as well as my DDD is pretty rapid for someone my age. Due to my pelvic floor still healing with its own scar tissue, I took the initiative to get back into aquatic therapy. It's been helpful but rough because being on the hypermobility spectrum means that I need to strengthen my muscles but not over-strengthen them. The more I learn about it, the more it explains why I easily pull my muscles and hurt myself all of the time.
This reminds me that there's a whole other ballpark of things going on with my in-laws that at least don't affect me as heavily as my immediate family. Sheldon's oldest brother went through a divorce two years ago but has found someone new in the dating pool. I'm very happy for him. His sister went through with her divorce. I don't remember if I mentioned it before or not, but I had to teach her and his parents what a narcissist was, as well as gaslighting. That wasn't very pretty, but it's better than staying in an abusive relationship. Then there's his other brother, who has also been having TBD marriage issues. It's their daughter who came out as trans this past year, and Sheldon and I have been doing what we can to help her feel validated, loved, and accepted in any way that we can.
Sheldon's mom had surgery on her spine for a sciatic nerve. She's healing really well, at least. The issue was that her prior surgery missed the entire problem of her back pain, and when she was still not feeling better, new doctors evaluated her and were like, "uhm, yeah, that wasn't the problem; this was." Apparently it was in an area that the surgeon should have noticed during her surgery but didn't. It took a while to get her in to see someone, but at least it got taken care of in the end. She's similar to me in that her migraines start as tension headaches in the neck and shoulders. Maybe I can help her out as I learn things with my physical therapy.
August
Since Nephew J and Niece H had their turns with sleeping over. My mom offered sister M and her son A to come down and sleep over at her home for a weekend. She helped A get some back-to-school things ready, and I let him and his mom visit to come swim in our pool. It wasn't a sleepover, but at least he can say he's been here too.
As far as court goes, my brother was worried that if no one took my sister, then she would have a warrant out for her arrest. My dad had zero concern about it all, saying that they wouldn't arrest her for that. Then my mom got overwhelmed, not knowing what to do. Sister M's high school best friend ended up taking her to court. She got the hospice records from my mom to give to them, and allegedly the judge was super nice to my sister and said they'd look over the documents.
That friend said that when she got to the house to pick up sister M, she wasn't home. No one knew that she went for a walk, and she had to drive around and look for her. Then they started to leave, and her husband decided that he wanted to go with. At first he didn't, but I think he knew it would look bad if he wasn't there as her supervised caretaker.
After that, my dad decided to care and said he got a lawyer for them. They claimed that the lawyer never showed up, so the court date was rescheduled. At this point, whatever happens happens. I don't want to see her in a jail cell suffering with officers who may not know or understand her condition. However, I also can't do anything to save or fix the situation.
I stopped paying for her phone because she kept complaining about it being junk. She got a Google number and allegedly a SNAP phone so she can continue to use those. I still pay for her kids' phones, but I don't mind that so much. Someone's gotta look out for them, and I refuse to be worried about my nephew not having a way to contact me in case of an emergency.
That friend said that when she got to the house to pick up sister M, she wasn't home. No one knew that she went for a walk, and she had to drive around and look for her. Then they started to leave, and her husband decided that he wanted to go with. At first he didn't, but I think he knew it would look bad if he wasn't there as her supervised caretaker.
After that, my dad decided to care and said he got a lawyer for them. They claimed that the lawyer never showed up, so the court date was rescheduled. At this point, whatever happens happens. I don't want to see her in a jail cell suffering with officers who may not know or understand her condition. However, I also can't do anything to save or fix the situation.
I stopped paying for her phone because she kept complaining about it being junk. She got a Google number and allegedly a SNAP phone so she can continue to use those. I still pay for her kids' phones, but I don't mind that so much. Someone's gotta look out for them, and I refuse to be worried about my nephew not having a way to contact me in case of an emergency.
Speaking of my nephew, my mom registered him with the Junior high that J goes to when he was living with her. Due to him moving back home, I had reached out to their principal, who assured me that they would make sure he was registered up there in time for school. He was able to attend back-to-school night and got registered then. My nephew told me that it takes 45 minutes for him to walk to school now, so I ordered him a Carhartt jacket and gloves for the wintertime. They are just .03 miles out of the school bus range, and he can't just get on at a stop without being registered for the bus, and so on for the safety of other students. It's a bunch of nonsense.
He learned to ride an old bike this summer after moving home. The bike chain was super rusted up, so his dad bought him a new one, and it keeps falling off. The bike shop up there closed, so I've been trying to figure out a way to help him out. I've been saving up a little bit to send him money to get a new bike. It's a little bit of a walk to get to the store out there for him, but it would be worth it if he could pick a bike he liked and that fit him to ride back home.
I'm really proud of him though; he's been taking himself to school and washing his own laundry. He said he takes care of his room and his pets, and that's it. Which is good; he's not responsible for taking care of his parents. I am concerned that his dad still hasn't found a job after two years. His dad's sister (mentioned in May's post) said she can't keep affording to pay their mortgage, so we will see what happens, I guess.
I did reach out to my nephew's dad and told him that if they're on food stamps, then his son qualifies for free lunch at school. This apparently made him defensive, and he was telling me that his son is fine and his stepdaughter is fine and blah blah blah. So I snapped back, telling him that it was just information to pass on and not an accusation, and I'm glad his son is registered for school. I know his stepdaughter is because I live close to her and keep in touch with her. That apparently made him back up because he replied Thank you. People are exhausting.
This month I also had the opportunity to participate in my very first 5K! It was a mud run that resulted in being a blast! I went with one of my friends, who made it more worth it to go. It was called the Mud Girl Run, and all application fees went to supporting breast cancer research. The best part about this run was that it was all teamwork-based. The second you were helped up over an obstacle, you turned around and helped the person behind you. They did forget to fill up some of the water stations closer to the finish line, but we survived either way.
I am also able to check off Good Charlotte from my emo teenage concert list. They were super good in person! Avenged Sevenfold also played, but it was pretty disappointing. I love them, but the lead singer is losing his voice, so they're trying out a new thing they call Statica. It's like taking their rock music and mixing it with electronic music, which sounded pretty awful in our opinion.
The weeks following up to the concert were stressful. Sheldon didn't ask for work off because he usually gets off at 5:30 PM anyways. But his boss scheduled them to do an install that week. I was very upset by it, but in the end they were kind and worked with him to get home before the concert started.
Earlier this year, I also mentioned that sister A had run off to Idaho without telling anybody, and she came home drunk and suicidal. Well, that's because she found out that her husband was paying for a cam girl and said he caught feelings for her. Her son is from a prior relationship, and her current husband stepped up and signed the birth certificate for him. So they've been married for about 11 or 12 years.
Their son begged them to stay together, so she told him that if he deleted the app, then she would give him another chance. Apparently, he did, but he stopped putting in effort overall. He didn't even give her a Mother's Day gift.
Fast forward to this month: I had purchased the concert tickets back in December of 2025. I added two extra tickets so my sister A and her husband could go. They paid me for them back then too. After the cam girl incident, he had been staying late after work to go to the gym and then come home for a few hours, then back to work.
He wears a silicone wedding band to work but refuses to wear it at the gym. He apparently met a girl who he had deep feelings for and didn't tell her that he is married. The girl believed that he had a son from a past relationship with my sister instead. While he claimed he wasn't cheating, he still spent all of his time with her instead of at home.
He told my sister that he invited this girl to the concert, but he won't sit in his seat so it won't be awkward for all of us. That, and my sister had to find her own ride because the girl he's bringing wouldn't be okay if my sister was in the car too. Then he changed his mind and said that if my sister was going, he wouldn't go. So that was a shit show.
At the time, I didn't know if Sheldon's work was going to work with him to go to the concert or not, so I ended up chewing out Sister A's husband and telling him how selfish he is being about all of this.
He ended up telling the girl that he was married, so then she cut things off with him, and he was too depressed to be home over it all. He took my sister to the concert, and we were all civil while enjoying the music.
That night I received a text from my nephew at about 3 in the morning saying he loves me and asked how the concert was. After the concert had ended, my sister's husband told her that he was going out to get their son some food. He didn't come back until about 6 or 7 am the next morning, without food. No one could get a hold of him, not even his own parents. It turns out that he already found a new side chick. She allegedly is also married with kids, and she did not want him being home and sleeping with my sister since they both had some drinks at the concert.
That was the nail in the coffin for everyone. He's currently making it hard to get a divorce worked out, but he told my sister he can't control himself. A grown-ass man in his 40's not being able to control himself from cheating is what I like to call a man-child with excuses.
So yeah, this is what I mean about it being one thing after another. I'm not responsible for the kids, but they come to me seeking a safe space, and I'm not going to shut them out. I didn't have that when I was growing up; I will not allow them to feel alone like I did!
The only other thing that happened was that my test results came back clear for the first time since 2019! The LEEP surgery that they performed during my laparoscopy removed stage 2 and 3 of pre-cancer! I'm not as worried about that growing back as I am about the endometriosis, but I am still cautious, of course. I'm just relieved that it wasn't for nothing.
Conclusion
He learned to ride an old bike this summer after moving home. The bike chain was super rusted up, so his dad bought him a new one, and it keeps falling off. The bike shop up there closed, so I've been trying to figure out a way to help him out. I've been saving up a little bit to send him money to get a new bike. It's a little bit of a walk to get to the store out there for him, but it would be worth it if he could pick a bike he liked and that fit him to ride back home.
I'm really proud of him though; he's been taking himself to school and washing his own laundry. He said he takes care of his room and his pets, and that's it. Which is good; he's not responsible for taking care of his parents. I am concerned that his dad still hasn't found a job after two years. His dad's sister (mentioned in May's post) said she can't keep affording to pay their mortgage, so we will see what happens, I guess.
I did reach out to my nephew's dad and told him that if they're on food stamps, then his son qualifies for free lunch at school. This apparently made him defensive, and he was telling me that his son is fine and his stepdaughter is fine and blah blah blah. So I snapped back, telling him that it was just information to pass on and not an accusation, and I'm glad his son is registered for school. I know his stepdaughter is because I live close to her and keep in touch with her. That apparently made him back up because he replied Thank you. People are exhausting.
This month I also had the opportunity to participate in my very first 5K! It was a mud run that resulted in being a blast! I went with one of my friends, who made it more worth it to go. It was called the Mud Girl Run, and all application fees went to supporting breast cancer research. The best part about this run was that it was all teamwork-based. The second you were helped up over an obstacle, you turned around and helped the person behind you. They did forget to fill up some of the water stations closer to the finish line, but we survived either way.
I am also able to check off Good Charlotte from my emo teenage concert list. They were super good in person! Avenged Sevenfold also played, but it was pretty disappointing. I love them, but the lead singer is losing his voice, so they're trying out a new thing they call Statica. It's like taking their rock music and mixing it with electronic music, which sounded pretty awful in our opinion.
The weeks following up to the concert were stressful. Sheldon didn't ask for work off because he usually gets off at 5:30 PM anyways. But his boss scheduled them to do an install that week. I was very upset by it, but in the end they were kind and worked with him to get home before the concert started.
Earlier this year, I also mentioned that sister A had run off to Idaho without telling anybody, and she came home drunk and suicidal. Well, that's because she found out that her husband was paying for a cam girl and said he caught feelings for her. Her son is from a prior relationship, and her current husband stepped up and signed the birth certificate for him. So they've been married for about 11 or 12 years.
Their son begged them to stay together, so she told him that if he deleted the app, then she would give him another chance. Apparently, he did, but he stopped putting in effort overall. He didn't even give her a Mother's Day gift.
Fast forward to this month: I had purchased the concert tickets back in December of 2025. I added two extra tickets so my sister A and her husband could go. They paid me for them back then too. After the cam girl incident, he had been staying late after work to go to the gym and then come home for a few hours, then back to work.
He wears a silicone wedding band to work but refuses to wear it at the gym. He apparently met a girl who he had deep feelings for and didn't tell her that he is married. The girl believed that he had a son from a past relationship with my sister instead. While he claimed he wasn't cheating, he still spent all of his time with her instead of at home.
He told my sister that he invited this girl to the concert, but he won't sit in his seat so it won't be awkward for all of us. That, and my sister had to find her own ride because the girl he's bringing wouldn't be okay if my sister was in the car too. Then he changed his mind and said that if my sister was going, he wouldn't go. So that was a shit show.
At the time, I didn't know if Sheldon's work was going to work with him to go to the concert or not, so I ended up chewing out Sister A's husband and telling him how selfish he is being about all of this.
He ended up telling the girl that he was married, so then she cut things off with him, and he was too depressed to be home over it all. He took my sister to the concert, and we were all civil while enjoying the music.
That night I received a text from my nephew at about 3 in the morning saying he loves me and asked how the concert was. After the concert had ended, my sister's husband told her that he was going out to get their son some food. He didn't come back until about 6 or 7 am the next morning, without food. No one could get a hold of him, not even his own parents. It turns out that he already found a new side chick. She allegedly is also married with kids, and she did not want him being home and sleeping with my sister since they both had some drinks at the concert.
That was the nail in the coffin for everyone. He's currently making it hard to get a divorce worked out, but he told my sister he can't control himself. A grown-ass man in his 40's not being able to control himself from cheating is what I like to call a man-child with excuses.
So yeah, this is what I mean about it being one thing after another. I'm not responsible for the kids, but they come to me seeking a safe space, and I'm not going to shut them out. I didn't have that when I was growing up; I will not allow them to feel alone like I did!
The only other thing that happened was that my test results came back clear for the first time since 2019! The LEEP surgery that they performed during my laparoscopy removed stage 2 and 3 of pre-cancer! I'm not as worried about that growing back as I am about the endometriosis, but I am still cautious, of course. I'm just relieved that it wasn't for nothing.
