June 2025
Blessed Litha
Litha is a pagan holiday that celebrates the summer solstice, which is the longest day of the year. It's a time for fertility and joy and is associated with the symbols of the sun and fire to represent growth, strength, and abundance. It is celebrated by having bonfires, feasts, and connecting with the natural world.
Adventures!
Friends and Family:
I also had the opportunity to experience my first-ever sound bath class! It was really neat to experience! I was very tired after work and had a flare-up coming on, but it still felt relaxing nonetheless. I was able to focus on the really easy sounds. Typically, when I meditate, my thoughts are all over the place. She would also use the instruments above us (we all had facemasks on) to heighten the experience, but if we didn't like it, we just had to raise our hand so she would know we were sound-sensitive. I would really love to experience it again.
I was also fortunate enough to take a beginner's terrarium class. I arrived early to allow myself enough time to handle my driving PTSD. I made it safe and I did just fine, but it's still out of my comfort zone. When I arrived, I walked around for a little bit and sat down to wait for everyone else. This adorable elderly lady came in with a box full of plants and an empty terrarium ready to go. She spotted me and introduced herself, and asked me to be her friend. Turns out she worked there and wanted to take the class. It was pretty adorable! She told her coworkers I was her friend and came with her to the class. Her hair had some faded blue dye in it, too, so I knew right away she was a cool person.
It's been around 90 - 100 F these last few weeks, so we took Juno to get his first-ever snow cone (just the shaved ice for him). Of course, I had to get the yummy rainbow gummy bear one!
Language Learning:
I am on day 269 of Duolingo Spanish!
Gaming:
I successfully got Sheldon hooked on FFXIV, and I couldn't be happier! I've been geeking out over my introverted self being a little more comfortable doing dungeons with strangers as he is partying up with me. There have been a few really friendly gamers that I'm still shy to try to befriend, but I'm happy that I'm breaking out of my shell and interacting with them.
We have also started to play Dune Awakening as it has just been released. It's a crafting survival game and pretty fun. The only downside is that the private servers keep crashing, and the game was promised to have PVP be optional, but as of right now, they have one area that's all PVP, and you need to mine certain resources there. It's an open world in that, even in a private server, you get joined in with other players, which is lame.
Reading:
The Flowers of Prophecy: The Daughter of Danray: I finished the third book in the series, and it's been so good! I am now left on a cliffhanger and eagerly waiting to see what happens with the fourth book!
A Series of Unfortunate Events: This book series, I started as an audiobook in third grade. My teacher would play it for us in class every week, and it was my favorite. We only made it to book six by the end of the school year, so I'm enjoying re-listening to my childhood and finding out what will happen.
Dune: The book was a little hard to follow at first, mostly because it jumps through time and doesn't really explain it. I really enjoyed listening to it, having never seen the movies and knowing nothing about it. I tried to start the old Dune movie, but I couldn't get past how bad the beginning of it is. That's what happens when you read a book first and then try to watch the adaptation.
Extras: This was the final book in the Uglies trilogy, and I have to say I liked it. It took a different perspective from a new character's point of view, but it still brought back some old characters, with how the last book ended.
Aremis Fowl: I just finished book four, and I have to say that the series is still really good. I just have to be patient because it has a bit of a waiting list for each book.
The Raven Boys - The Dream Thieves: I'm still unsure how I feel about the series. I really like the idea and aspect of the main female character's storyline. A lot of it is interesting, there's just something so dry about the books that makes it a little hard for me to follow at times. I don't know how to explain it. I want to listen to them more to find out what happens, but I'm not as drawn into them as I am other books.
Anime/K-Dramas:
Sheldon and I are watching Season 3 of Squid Game! I still think Alice in Borderlands is better when it comes to the idea of playing games to survive. However, they both are really great stories with their own unique characters. I just feel that Squid Games got over hyped when it came out, and Alice in Borderlands didn't get enough hype.
Concerts:
I'm honestly kind of happy that my concerts are slowing down for the year. I'm slightly burned out on going to them. I have the last few artists on my bucket list. I would like to see if they tour again, but I am also content with just being at home now.
Vana
Honey Revenge
Mental Health Status:
I'm slowly making progress in working on my own emotional regulation. I want to be able to handle my PTSD triggers in a better manner when I feel attached. My natural response is a fight or flight, and I tend to just break down crying and shaking.
We have also made more progress in unpacking a lot of childhood trauma, and I'm learning to unlearn things such as how I can have sympathy for someone without becoming completely empathetic to a point that I feel helpless.
I'm still working a lot on Dialetics and stopping the what if, or if only mindset on things.
Another goal of mine is to work through my body image and the way I perceive myself. My Gender Dysphoria is okay; it's my body dysmorphia overall that I need to work on. I can't continue my dietitian's intuitive eating mindset if I'm not giving myself grace and loving my body wholly. That's actually a huge portion of Intuitive Eating.
Physical Health Status:
Knee Pain:
I'm pretty grateful to have found a primary care doctor who is understanding of my anxiety and lets me get things tested as I ask. We got some X-rays of my knees because the pain has been quite constant, off and on. We have discovered that I have tendinitis in my hamstrings.
He has also taken notes of my random full-body flare-ups and will do further testing after we figure out my gynecology stuff, if it's not related.
Gynecology:
I was able to get a referral to get a pelvic exam in July. A lot of my pain, such as fake UTIs, cramps when I'm not on my cycle, random pains that feel like I pulled a muscle on either ovary, and having pain radiate all the way up under my right rib. It all has been overbearing. This is just one of the next steps to see what's wrong. She also put me on a new birth control that's supposed to help me skip my monthly cycles. We will see if that helps calm any pain down or not. So far, my body is absolutely hating adjusting to it. I feel like it's increased my symptoms.
Health Wrap Up:
I had some basic appointments like the chiropractor, acupuncture, dental cleaning, and physical therapy. They were just my normal routine, so I don't really have any health updates to add for them. I fell asleep again during acupuncture. I asked him to hit trigger points to help lessen my flare-ups, and I think it did help.
Final Thoughts:
I'm in the final month of getting our wedding together. I'm super excited but a little stressed about it. Between doctor appointments, our wedding planning, and work, I just don't have a lot of energy to want to hang out or go do things. I'm taking life a day at a time, and I trust that the universe will work things out the way it's meant to. I just ask everyone to please be patient with me. Mental health, chronic pain, and life stress just makse me more of an introvert sometimes.
